unrealistic expectations in marriage
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Unrealistic Expectations in Marriage by Adedamola Olajumoke is a book that gives Biblical insight into marriage the way God intended it to be. Perfect reading for newly weds as well as those who may have become bored with married life. She gives practical insight into helpful ways to spice up the relationship in a healthy way. The book is available in the United States as well as in Africa printed by two publishing houses simultaneously! 


Everyone has an expectation or expectations about marriage. Many of these expectations are product of the background from which individuals evolved. In most cases societal views, individual traits, Nollywood, Bollywood and Hollywood form d bases of these expectations .It is so funny that marriage turns a different ball game entirely with many of the expectations far from realizable. So, we rush to a quick conclusion that marriage is not working or shifts blame on our partners.

Expectations are important; it is not possible to enter into such a powerful contract without having expectations. Expectations are one’s desires, what one wants and continually wants to see in one’s marriage or partner. Expectation is a yardstick to measure if one is really pleased with one’s marriage or not but the challenge lies with the larger than life catalogue of ideals we envisage in our homes with more of the responsibilities shifting to the doorstep of our partners.

Many expectations by young ones even married couples are vague. It is nothing but mere fantasies, fictions of the moonlight tale. They are far from reality because of the perspective from which they are coming from. For instance, in Nollywood, the way marriage is been viewed is not real. They show marriage as a contract without any tough responsibilities and conflicting interest, enjoyable at all time and without any stress but this far from the truth. Sometimes, it is being viewed as all of conflicts, undependable and never to be trusted affairs, which is also far from the truth.

This book is not to prepare you for the negative but an eye opener to a responsibility based relationship. If you know you are opened to flaws, so also your partner does. Reality says "healthy marriage" is a conscious work". It is however an attempt to help young ones that are yet to get married and the married to correct their expectations, and have them based on the right views.

When your expectation toward your partner is realistic, it makes the path easy to tread than unrealistic expectations capable of choking the relationship.

One of the major reasons why our expectations are unrealistic is our selfish motive. The dream of a perfect domestic husband, cool, understanding, tolerant enough to join you in the kitchen, clean up your baby and still remember to give you a candle light, emotion filled birthday trip or the dream of an el-shaddai kind of wife who can be as smart as you are, full of respect and honor for you, handle many things at a time, remain elegant and firm in shape, accommodate your friends and families and so on and on. The challenge is we all like to be on the receiving side, giving justification for why our partners should serve us. 

Adedamola Olajumoke

  • growing your faith: growing in your faith
  • marriage: marriage
  • Item #: AO-5688 book

Unrealistic Expectations in Marriage

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